Lead up to the Full Swap

Prerequisite post: Swinging: The Full Swap Explained

At this point, Jeannie had explored outercourse with two new men. Over the course of less than a half dozen dates, she’d experienced most of what she wanted to try with these two men. She also met a couple at one of the two parties she attended and they were very much interested in a full swap. Meanwhile, all I’d done is make out with a young woman at a Brooklyn bar and a (super hot!) surfer dude on the beach in LA. I felt like I was a little behind, but as the opportunity for a full swap presented itself with a couple that Jeannie was comfortable with, I was definitely interested.

Of course, as experienced swingers, their idea of “meet me” was to “fuck me.”

Jeannie already spent a night with Jake and Mia… and not only did everyone enjoy themselves, but they enjoyed Jeannie’s stories enough that they wanted to meet me as well. Of course, as experienced swingers, their idea of “meet me” was to “fuck me.” And between what Jeannie shared of her experience with them, and a few simple photos, I was most definitely interested. I found Mia to be very attractive and while a photo of him didn’t turn me on, I’ve found that how a man looks doesn’t (usually) turn me on, but how he acts can get me very interested.

Continue reading Lead up to the Full Swap

House Guest with a Twist

photography of bedroom

After our marathon Memorial Day Weekend date, I didn’t hear from Hank much and the week that followed was quiet and uneventful in that regard. Then I departed for Italy, during which time texts from Hank were limited at best and I began to question his interest in what we were doing. I was loathe to chase him and instead waited to see what would happen. We finally made plans for the weekend of the next erotic party, but his attention was still a bit lackluster and our actual plans were only half formed, so I was admittedly anxious at the date drew near. Continue reading House Guest with a Twist

Return to the Scene of the Sublime

abstract adult art back

OK, this is admittedly a really long post, but it was a jam-packed party filled with lots of erotic encounters, so I hope you will enjoy the lengthy read almost as much as I enjoyed living the experience.

Since I had really enjoyed my first erotic party, I was eager to attend the same event a month later. And, while I had always known that Hank would also be at the party, my decision to attend was based solely on my own desires. So, I did look forward to spending time with him, but also hoped to meet other people and press new edges. Hank had talked about us playing together with some other (unknown) woman – me sitting on his face, while instructing her to give him a blow job, but how such a scene would come to fruition was nebulous and I expressed equal parts potential interest and trepidation. Continue reading Return to the Scene of the Sublime

He Said: The Full Swap Revealed

This will be a long post about our full swap with Jake and Mia. It will begin innocently, just as the night began. And, as with that night, this post will get more and more explicit…

As “awkward” was quickly replaced with “smokin’ hot!”

The plan was to meet Jake and Mia at the hotel bar, but as luck would have it, we found them checking in as we arrived. Jake immediately leaned in and gave Jeannie a passionate kiss, and then Mia did the same. Each of these actions aroused me immediately, and then I was faced with the awkward, “what do I do?” moment. (I did nothing, yet.) There would be a few of these, but “awkward” was quickly replaced with “smokin’ hot!” so it was worth it.

Before going to the bar, we went to drop stuff off in our room and Mia proceeded to shower. While in the shower, Jake began kissing and fondling Jeannie; then after a few minutes looked up at me and said, “May I kiss your wife?” As I responded, “Of course,” Jeannie was saying to Jake, “Honey, I think that ship sailed long ago!” I next said, “May I share?” and Jake responded, “Sharing is caring.” While he and I had previously exchanged a few text messages and he made it pretty clear that they “enjoy it all” I still needed to find my footing.

I was very turned on that Mia was dressed so sexily… and specifically for me.

Continue reading He Said: The Full Swap Revealed

What to wear to a threesome

monochrome photo of woman laying on bed

Over the past two weeks, I had been texting back and forth with Jake and Mia (the couple I had met at the erotic party). They had initially invited me to join them at a swingers’ party, but I had another commitment on that date and we agreed that it would be better to connect as a threesome, rather than at a party, given my newness to the lifestyle.

We finally confirmed a date for the upcoming Friday. Friday morning, they advised me that they would get a hotel room in NJ (they live in NJ) and then text me the room number. I had always fantasized about participating in a threesome and was really looking forward to sharing the experience with them.  I spent the afternoon leisurely getting ready – bubble bath, primping, beautifying – and trying not to get too nervous. Continue reading What to wear to a threesome

Open Marriage, ENM, Compersion… Oh, My!

One thing I quickly learned as we began exploring an open marriage is that the terminology in this lifestyle can be complicated. (Here’s an accurate, but tongue in cheek summary of the lingo.) Open marriage seems simple enough and can even be found in the Merriam-Webster dictionary. I also began using the term polyamory until Jeannie pointed out an important nuance in that term. Those in a polyamorous relationship (often referred to as a Triad or a Quad, etc.) are committing long-term to all the members of that relationship. In many cases, they will all live together as well. So Jeannie was right in correcting me as we aren’t truly polyamorous. We have no desire to expand our current living arrangement.

It’s also interesting to note that language geeks hate the word polyamory because of it’s etymology:

polyamory2-229

There are also lots of somewhat interchangeable terms, each with its own nuance or baggage. One that I’ve come to use is Ethical Non-Monogamy, or ENM. In our case open marriage is more accurate since we are, in fact, married, and ENM is a broader term. So I guess I should stick with open marriage for the most part.

Continue reading Open Marriage, ENM, Compersion… Oh, My!

Sweet Surrender

54798-30 (1)My first date with Kevin (who I had met at the erotic party) was relatively tame, but really nice. We met at a casual restaurant overlooking the Hudson River, with views of the sunset.

Over drinks and a light dinner, we had a lovely time getting to know one another and feeling each other out for what we were looking for. It seemed like he wanted to take things slow, build a connection and was just generally a sweet guy. I wondered if perhaps he might be too nice/too vanilla but was open to see what would happen with time. And, I really liked his flirty texts; he had sent me a photo of his pool and noted that bathing suits were not permitted at night. Continue reading Sweet Surrender