Diligently Seeking Someone

Several months ago, I declared that I wanted a Boyfriend (yes, with a capital “B”) and, as I say of Viktor and myself, we never do anything by halves. So, needless to say, it has been an intensive, whirlwind two months. And, of course, while I am in search of said “Boyfriend,” I am still enjoying time with my existing set of men.

Early on in August, I finally made it to one of the monthly Polycocktails events, which was great. Viktor (who had been once before) and I went together and we met lots of lovely people, including Frank and his girlfriend, Dee. A few weeks later, Viktor and I had dinner with Frank and Dee, which was a wonderful opportunity to get to know them better, especially as we had spent more time at the mixer with Frank than Dee. Then, more recently, I met up with Frank on his own and am feeling into what I do or don’t want from him. I’m not sure there is sufficient chemistry on my part, but I think he is a really cool guy.

In mid-August, I took a well-deserved stay-cation, which included decadent spa visits (relax!), delicious dinners (restore!), a full day at the beach (recharge!) and a trio of encounters at the Empire Hotel (release!). Sunday night found me at the hotel’s rooftop bar, enjoying dinner and a cocktail, when I was approached by a handsome man named… Victor. We pretended that we were just meeting for the first time, as “Victor” (no longer Viktor for the night) and had fun getting to know one another before heading back to my room.

The following morning (Viktor had not spent the night), Gary arrived at my door bearing a cup of coffee. We then enjoyed using various combinations of the room number to work our way through the book on sex positions he had previously presented to me on indefinite loan. And, that night, Matt took me out for light bites and drinks after which we had a very lovely time savoring each other late into the night and again in the morning, before returning to real life (aka work).

The following week, Lawrence ventured uptown to meet Viktor and me at our local wine bar during which we all flirted and had fun. After dinner and drinks, we headed back to our apartment for even more fun! Then, there was an overdue rendezvous with Tim in our usual bar + hotel = fun equation.

Viktor and I were also busy with related events, going to see Rufus del Sol at Brooklyn Mirage (and taking molly together for the first time), attending a fun play party in Brooklyn and donning fetish attire for the Bound x Elements music event at Elsewhere.

As we closed out August and went into the Labor Day Weekend, I had an amazing boudoir photoshoot with the very talented Carmen Rubio (I’ll write more about that soon)!  And, while heading to Boston to visit dear friends for the holiday weekend, Viktor mentioned that he had just joined OKCupid because it was now good for poly people. He had connected with a few folks and was optimistic.

Not one to be left out, I downloaded the app that Saturday night and was soon chatting with 15 or so men, along with several others on Feeld. I was overwhelmed and over-saturated, so I disengaged from most of them, but have had dates with a few of them, notably Sam and Eric.

I am also still chatting with someone on Feeld, whom I call Mr. Lemur because he was traveling in Madagascar for about a month (and sent a selfie of him and a lemur at my request!). He wants to meet up eventually, but has been away on business for such a long time, I am concerned that he only has the ability to be a pen pal and not a boyfriend. We’ll see.

If I am nothing, I am thorough, but, more importantly, I am finding the fun, playful pleasure in all of this research.

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While happily married to my soulmate for 20+ years, after years of body shame and sexual shutdown, I am ready to step into my sexual power as we open up our relationship and explore the possibilities.

5 thoughts on “Diligently Seeking Someone”

  1. I stumbled across your blog and in my reading marathon I think that this most recent post is the first time that you have called it “our apartment” rather then my apartment.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for the marathon visit!
      Hope you enjoyed what you read. Interesting that you picked up on that — I likely did that (refer to it as our) because I was writing about Viktor and me instead of just me.


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