Return to the Scene of the Sublime

abstract adult art back

OK, this is admittedly a really long post, but it was a jam-packed party filled with lots of erotic encounters, so I hope you will enjoy the lengthy read almost as much as I enjoyed living the experience.

Since I had really enjoyed my first erotic party, I was eager to attend the same event a month later. And, while I had always known that Hank would also be at the party, my decision to attend was based solely on my own desires. So, I did look forward to spending time with him, but also hoped to meet other people and press new edges. Hank had talked about us playing together with some other (unknown) woman – me sitting on his face, while instructing her to give him a blow job, but how such a scene would come to fruition was nebulous and I expressed equal parts potential interest and trepidation.

I took my time getting ready for the party, indulging in a bubble bath, carefully choosing my lingerie/outfit and getting into the theme: A Midsummer’s Night Dream. Inspired by another goddess who had noted that she would be sporting fairy wings, I chose to don a floral crown, putting it on at home and wearing it on the journey instead of waiting to get to the party. I felt sexy, beautiful and alive as I headed to Brooklyn.

After transferring from one subway line to another, I noticed that the man next to me looked familiar and I thought he was someone I had met at the previous party. But, how to know for sure? Talking to strangers on the subway was already a bit dicey, but to ask if someone had been at an erotic party… We both disembarked the train at the same stop and after acknowledging that we were both looking for the same address, the recognition was mutually confirmed.

We arrived at the venue and entered into what would be a magical night. I headed downstairs and was greeted by Hank, who was helping to host the event and thus busy for the early part of the evening. Hanging out at the bar, I met Kevin, who admired my crown and began to flirt with me a bit. I enjoyed the banter and attention but did feel a little torn as I wanted to reconnect with Hank after our marathon date, but also wanted to be open to new experiences and to see what else might happen. I could feel how being noticed made me feel desired and seen.

After Kevin drifted off, I spent time talking with friends and then chatted with a guy who referred to himself as BK Dom. Somehow, we ended up talking about bike racing, a sport in which Viktor is very active and I never got to find out about his other “passions,” still left wondering if BK Dom meant that he was a Master or simply a guy from Brooklyn named Dominic.  Also, as he wandered away in search of others, I thought about the etiquette of mentioning a husband, especially since I never explained that we had an open marriage. I had intentionally not worn my wedding ring (not to deliberately mislead anyone, but to ensure that I was approachable/not appearing to be off-limits), but it was an awkward and confusing dance that I realized I would have learn to negotiate in this new journey.

Only slightly disappointed, I, too, ventured away from the bar, finding Hank and walking through the downstairs area watching people in various acts of sexual play. It was titillating to watch, but I didn’t feel any compulsion to participate. Being honest with myself, I realized that, at least at this stage, I would be unable to relax enough to enjoy myself in the presence of so many people.

Hank and I headed back upstairs/outside, settling onto the couch near the fire pit, where we watched people getting tied up by a Shibari ropes master. Ahead of time, I had decided that I wanted to participate in this activity since I hadn’t done so last time, but, once at the party, didn’t necessarily want to wait on what seemed to be a lengthy line. Instead, I sat back and savored the show as rope was intricately wound around the human form.

A short while later, Hank introduced me to his friends Jake and Mia, who he knows from when he used to throw swinger parties. They joined us on the couch and we talked about the rope tying among other things. Jake asked if I had ever been tied up. “No.” Had I ever been chained? Again, I responded, “No.” Would I like to be? “Wait, what? You mean now?” He did mean now and then suddenly I was up on the balcony with Jake and Mia.

A leather collar was fastened around my neck, joined by restraints on my wrists, which were then linked by chains to the collar. They put a blindfold over my eyes and asked for permission to pull my bodysuit down, exposing my breasts. I consented and then Jake asked if my breasts were very sensitive. I wasn’t sure how to answer but admitted that I had never used nipple clamps. We agreed that I was willing to try a soft clamp and Jake attached it to my left breast. It pinched, but it was more of a discomfort than actually painful. Then, a flood of sensations followed…from all sides. I felt breath, I felt kisses, I felt my nipples being fondled. I couldn’t see or tell who was touching me anymore and I didn’t care. It felt wonderful and exciting and overwhelming. Then, I began to feel lightheaded and let Jake know that I regretfully needed to stop (but figured stopping was way sexier than passing out!).

After removing the cuffs, collar, clamp and blindfold, Mia brought me some water and I took some time to rest, reconnecting with Hank for a bit. Awhile later a friend introduced me to this guy she seemed to know. There was an instant connection as he slathered on the compliments. I felt his penetrating gaze and liked it. I felt super sexy and in control. As we sat on the couch, he asked me what my deal was, and I shared where I am at. He questioned me about Hank, but I assured him that there was no need to worry about Hank: I make my own decisions about whom I want to be with at any given time.

In between kisses, we continued to talk and he seemed more and more intrigued as I disclosed different details of myself. I felt energized by his adoration of these things that make me precisely and uniquely me. I liked the idea that who I am was so alluring and I tried to hold onto this sensation and knowledge as he told me I was perfect. He also revealed that he was very into oral sex, which I got him to clarify meant that he loves to give it and further expressed that he has the patience to give it for hours. I was quite intrigued and frankly a bit tempted, but as I had acknowledged to myself earlier, I wouldn’t be feel comfortable to participate in such an overt sexual experience in a party environment. I wondered if we might plan on something for another night, but discovered that he was visiting from out of town for the weekend only, so there was no way to explore it further and decided to put an end to our encounter.

Once up and off the couch, I stumbled across Hank who said that he was getting ready to head home. I felt a little guilty for ignoring him a bit, but tried to push those thoughts aside as we certainly don’t have any exclusive access to each other, not to mention the whole swinger lifestyle is essentially about sharing (yes, there is much more to it than that, but in this context…).

As I was speaking with Hank, Jake came up to me, letting me know that he and Mia were also about to leave and offered me a ride home. I decided that I was “full” from the party and accepted his invitation.  I went to say goodbye to the man from out of town, explaining that I had a ride home. He asked me to stay and noted that he would pay for a ride home later, but I kindly declined, kissed him one last time and wished him well.

I followed Jake and Mia back downstairs toward the exit, where I saw Kevin and let him know I was leaving. He expressed interest in seeing me again and also offered me a ride home if I wanted to stay longer, but I gave him my card instead and encouraged him to contact me.

Once outside, Jake and Mia asked if I was in a hurry to get home (I wasn’t) and asked me if I would join them for dinner. They took me to a restaurant in Chinatown, where we talked about my experience with them and my interest in repeating it in the future as well as having a more general discussion of the swinger lifestyle. Then, they drove me home and kissed me goodbye, before I headed into my apartment and off to bed.

I awoke early the next morning, a bit dazed, thinking about the party’s opening ritual during which the question was posed: Was it really a dream or was it reality? A slew of texts from Hank, Jake and Kevin in the hours that followed all provided evidence to the latter…as well as my fortune cookie fortune that read, “Stay in touch, above all, with how you feel.”

Photo by Corin Andrade on

Published by


While happily married to my soulmate for 20+ years, after years of body shame and sexual shutdown, I am ready to step into my sexual power as we open up our relationship and explore the possibilities.

6 thoughts on “Return to the Scene of the Sublime”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.